Reflections of the past year

“By three methods we may learn wisdom: First, by reflection, which is noblest; Second, by imitation, which is easiest; and third by experience, which is the bitterest”. Confucius 

Year End and Year Starts  - are always a time of deep reflections. I think about where I started twelve months ago and where I am now. I love to think and sometimes think perhaps a little too hard. But reflecting on one’s life while embracing all the good and the bad is a wonderful way to see the progress I've made or failed to make on this journey we call life.

 Here are some of my favourite reflections from the past year:

 My Wifey getting married and making me wear green. #AmaGreenBeans

From Barbie to #MrsTsele

 

    

Change is as good as a holiday - #LIkeABoy - cut my hair!!!! 

Meeting the real Captain Morgan #TickTickBoom

Jaheim SA Tour - I have waited years for this man to grace our shore - and he didnt disappoint!!! - paid for it by being voiceless for a week!

 

Leaving a job I though I loved to persuade my first love #PR Girl

      

 

Friendship and Good bye’s - A journey called life we meet people who touch our lives in different ways, we learn lessons. We Laugh.. We Cry.... And appreciate the lessons.... and Learn that not all are meant to be kept forever.... Loved and Cherished moments spend with you!!!! 

      


Going back to School - It wasn't easy but it was worth it!!! 
# EvaluatingMyWorth

  

Bobo and Linda's Wedding - Yep they finally tied they knot!!! 

 

Love - Wouldn't you like to know!!! 

All am saying is  _Lets see what 2015 has in this department 

Here’s Something to Think About!

We all hear about these stories at times. Someone missed their flight, only to find out later that the very plane they were scheduled to be on, crashed! Far Fetched you thinking... Well this actually happened to me on Monday... Was running late for work, only to find out later that there was a car accident on my the route take to work at the exact time I would normally travel that route. Coincidence? I think not!

As I was having my pity party I came across this dialogue, and it just reminded me how trully blessed I am.  I hope it does the same for you.

Me (in a tizzy) : God, can I ask you something?

GOD: Sure

Me: Promise you won’t get mad?

GOD: I promise

Me (frustrated):… Why did you let so much stuff happen to me today?

GOD: What do you mean?

Me: Well I woke up late

GOD: Yes

Me: My car took forever to start

Me (…growling): At…… lunch, they made my sandwich wrong and I had to wait

GOD: Hmmmm

Me: On the way home, my phone went dead, just as I picked up a call

GOD: All right…

Me (loudly): And to top it all off, when I got home, I just wanted to soak my feet in my foot massager and relax, but it wouldn’t work. Nothing went right today! Why did you do that?

GOD: Well let me see….. the death angel was at your bed this morning and I had to send one of the other angels to battle him for your life. I let you sleep through that.

Me (humbled): Oh…

GOD: I didn’t let your car start because there was a drunk driver on your route that might have hit you if you were on the road.

Me (ashamed):

GOD: The first person who made your sandwich today was sick and I didn’t want you to catch what they had, I knew you couldn’t afford to miss work.

Me (embarrassed): Oh.

GOD: Your phone went dead because the person that was calling was going to give a false witness about what you said on that call, I didn’t even let you talk to them so you would be covered.

Me (softly): I see, God

GOD: Oh and that foot massager, it had a short that was going to throw out all of the power in your house tonight. I didn’t think you wanted to be in the dark.

Me: I’m sorry God.

GOD: Don’t be sorry, just learn to trust me…In all things, the good and the bad.

Me: I WILL trust you God.

GOD: And don’t doubt that my plan for your day is always better than your plan.

Me: I won’t God. And let me just tell you God, thank you for everything today!

GOD: You’re welcome child. It was just another day being your God!

Lord, Thank You for Your daily protection. Thank You for protecting me from the seen and the unseen. In Jesus Name. Amen

Celebrating a Milestone

Today marks my 1 yr anniversary of working for Mann Made Media .When I started, I just hoped I’d make it a yr without being fired ; can’t wait for another year. The most fun part of the job, without question, is being surrounded by so many smart, intelligent and fun people.

I remember passing this company years back with a friend and saying to ourselves we want to work for Mann Made Media without knowledge of what they did, and today here I am one year later still loving it.

Here is some of the lovely, inspirational messages I have received :

Whether you dream big or dream small, chances are your dream will come true if you believe in it and really work on it.

Only God knows what we are in the future, the only thing we must do is that we should believe in Him, and in ourselves too. It is within us the power to reach our brighter tomorrow!!!

Whoop whoop

Happy Happy Jabu J

Congrats girl!!!!!!! You better not leave... ever! :) 

Letter to Myself

I love you.

I’m not sure if these words mean enough. I know they didn’t when you were younger and tried to end your life. They didn’t mean much when you wanted to hang yourself, leap into traffic, and drive your car into a wall.

But I want you to know how much those words mean right now. I love you, Jabulile. We’ve been together—literally—our entire lives. I don’t imagine us parting ways anytime soon. I’m writing this for an audience, but I’m especially writing this for you.

I want you to know that I care. I care about what you eat. I care about how you’re treating our body. I care about your thoughts. I care about your words. I want to know exactly how you feel about something and then do exactly what you want to do. I want you to be honest with me. Most of all, I want you to stop being afraid.

You’re smart. You’re entertaining. People love you. Enjoy that. Enjoy the moments you’re given. Enjoy the memories you make with me and with others. Enjoy your life, because you deserve it.

You can’t keep holding onto the past. It won’t change. True, there are problems back there that may affect the way you live today, but it’s not worth pondering over. Trust me. You know that reliving dead, hurtful moments aren’t going to divine well for our future—or even our present.

I think that’s the most important part of this. I love you now. I always will love you now. My only ask, and I’m begging here, is that you love me back. Together, we can change!!! 

Love 

Jabulile Maloisane 

Take it easy, Jabulile. Be happy. You’ll realize that it’s all you’ve got. See the beauty within and without that God has given you. Don’t destroy it. Share it with others. Soon, all this may be transformed into something you may not understand. Love yourself. That will make it easier. 

Dear Jabulile, Everything ends up ok. Keep the faith, and all will be well. 

John Legend - All of Me Lyric and Video

#DearFutureHubby Take note!! 

What would I do without your smart mouth
Drawing me in, and you kicking me out
You've got my head spinning, no kidding, I can't pin you down
What's going on in that beautiful mind
I'm on your magical mystery ride
And I'm so dizzy, don't know what hit me, but I'll be alright

[Bridge:]
My head's under water
But I'm breathing fine
You're crazy and I'm out of my mind

[Chorus:]
'Cause all of me
Loves all of you
Love your curves and all your edges
All your perfect imperfections
Give your all to me
I'll give my all to you
You're my end and my beginning
Even when I lose I'm winning
'Cause I give you all of me
And you give me all of you, oh

[Verse 2:]
How many times do I have to tell you
Even when you're crying you're beautiful too
The world is beating you down, I'm around through every mood
You're my downfall, you're my muse
My worst distraction, my rhythm and blues
I can't stop singing, it's ringing, in my head for you

[Bridge:]
My head's under water
But I'm breathing fine
You're crazy and I'm out of my mind

[Chorus:]
'Cause all of me
Loves all of you
Love your curves and all your edges
All your perfect imperfections
Give your all to me
I'll give my all to you
You're my end and my beginning
Even when I lose I'm winning
'Cause I give you all of me
And you give me all of you, oh

Give me all of you
Cards on the table, we're both showing hearts
Risking it all, though it's hard

[Chorus:]
'Cause all of me
Loves all of you
Love your curves and all your edges
All your perfect imperfections
Give your all to me
I'll give my all to you
You're my end and my beginning
Even when I lose I'm winning
'Cause I give you all of me
And you give me all of you

I give you all of me
And you give me all of you, oh

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=450p7goxZqg

To all my rainbow friends whom made 2013 a great and colourful year - Thank You

Thanks you for all the laughs we shared, the tears we cried, the advise you gave, and of cause all the drinking sprees we have had, all much appreciated and followed with a little twitch!! 2013 was good because of all, you are all special in your unique ways. 

May you all SHINE is 2014 and fortune!! Yep, let make it a year to continue growing, spiritually, financially, mentally and career-wise. Be safe, alert and try not to drink and drive. 

2013 Has Taught Me 

1.     No matter how many times my heart was broken, I can still love 

2.     To trust no one. No matter how good or bad someone is, they all have the same ability to break your heart.

3.     To follow my dreams

4.     Life is not fair, but it’s worth living

5.     That I'm better off without all those people I once called friends

6.     Not every battle is worth the fight

7.     To be thankful

8.     Am blessed, highly favoured and God’s strongest soldier

Love Miss J  

Life Lessons to Live By Daily......

I was going through old emails the other day and I stumbled over these words. So beautiful, so true... I have to share them with you...

Sometimes people come into your life and you know right away that they were meant to be there, to serve some sort of purpose, teach you a lesson, or help you figure out who you are or who you want to become.

You never know who these people may be (possibly your neighbour, professor, long lost friend, lover, or even a complete stranger), but when you lock eyes with them, you know at that very moment that they will affect your life in some profound way.

Sometime things will happen to you that may seem horrible, painful and unfair at first, but in reflection you find that, without overcoming these obstacles, you would have never realised your true potential, strength, will power, or heart!

Everything happens for a reason. Nothing happens by chance or by means of good luck. Illness, injury, love, lost moments of true greatness and sheer stupidity all occur to test the limits of your soul.

Without these small tests, whatever they may be, life would be like a smoothly paved, straight, flat road to nowhere. It would be safe and comfortable, but dull and utterly pointless.

The people who you meet who affect your life, and the success and downfalls you experience, help to create who you are and who you will become.

Even the bad experiences are learned from. In fact, they are the most poignant ones.

If someone hurts you, betrays you, or breaks your heart, forgive them for they have helped you learn about trust and the importance of being cautious when you open your heart.

If someone loves you, love them back unconditionally, not only because they love you, but because in a way, they are teaching you to love and how to open your heart and eyes to things.

Make every day count. Appreciate every moment and take from those moments everything you possibly can for you may never be able to experience it again. Talk to people who you have never talked to before and actually listen... break free, and set your sights high. Hold your head up because you have every right to.

Tell yourself that you are a great individual and believe in yourself. For if you don't believe in yourself, it will be hard for others to believe in you.

You can make your life anything you wish...Create it and then go out and live it with absolutely NO REGRETS. Most importantly, make sure your family and friends know that you love them, for you NEVER know what tomorrow may have in store.

Today is the tomorrow you were worried about yesterday.... Was it worth it?

MY LOVE LIFE IS ALWAYS TRENDING

I love LOVE.... 

I love how it makes me blush, smile, laugh,and warms my heart

Love has its own pro's and cons : It the most wonderful feeling in the world, and sometimes it hurts . It cuts so deep and just when we think we’ll never recover, our heart heals and comes back stronger than ever because the heart can’t help but love. 

Love certainly is the greatest and possibly the most effective motivator. 

LOVE CHANGES THINGS.... 

You may probably think I’m referring to the kind of love that involves romance because that’s what we've done to love. For the most part, we refer to love as our love life, we've reduced its meaning to the nature of one’s relationship with their significant other. Although that is one of the most important and life-defining relationships any person can ever have, love is much bigger than that relationship. There are so many more things to love about life than just our love life. Reducing this to only one type of love deprives us of living to the fullest and makes one miserable when their relationship status is currently “single”.

How is your love life then?

What do you love about life? 

I love the simplicity that is my life, the joy that is my nieces, and the rock that is my sisters (Bo-sesi). I love my friends and how they are just always there, and from all walks of life and help enrich my journey. I love my family, and the challenges we face together.

At any given point in my life, I deserve a life filled with love and lovely things. I’ve chosen that my love life will always be trending because I LOVE LIFE.

It's Almost Spring!!!!

Something about the change of season has reminded me:

•             Relax and calm your anxieties

•             Stop pushing for things to happen

•             Stop worrying that things won’t happen

•             Detach from the outcome you so vehemently hold on to

•             What will be, will be

•             Everything has its time and everything has its course

All I can do is try my best

Smile as much I can

Investing my energies into finding humor in situations

And when I decide to loosen my grip on imaginary control, and let life be, and let life breathe – things will magically come together with simplicity

It almost Spring!!!!!

Our lives are shifting. And everything is exactly where it is supposed to be!!!

Weave Miseries…

I commend women who can a wear weave all the time. I really do.

I have some friends whose weaves always look  good, shiny, healthy, natural looking and not a strand out of place no matter the day, time or season!!!!

It seems like the lowest maintenance hairstyle ever…besides a shaved head.

Since I decided to stop wearing relaxers, I figured a weave would help me with the transition. Plus, being as cold as it is, I figured a weave will keep my head warmer than my hair will.

So I went to the saloon, and put on a weave, 14 inch nogal…

2 weeks later, and I’m over it. Maybe I just don’t know how to take care of it, but this weave is tooooo much! For one, it gets tangled from nothing. It’s easy to comb out but who wants to be combing their hair all the time?

Plus it comes out a LOT. My brushes, combs, bedroom and bathroom floors are filled with hair. My brother saw one of my brushes and called me at work to make sure I was okay!

Hair!!!

To make matters worse, my scalp itches like nobody’s business, even though I base regularly.

Even worse, the weave is long and has a permanent dent – undoubtedly because of the way I wear my hair at night.

I may not be taking care of it correctly but this weave is a lot of work!!!!

I miss digging my nails into my scalp and running my fingers through my hair and whipping my hair back and forth while dancing around my room and getting dressed in the morning (figure of speech, work with me, I know black hair cannot be whipped back and forth).

I planned to keep this in for about 6-8 weeks, but it’s been 2 weeks and I’m dying!

Honestly though, I think I’m just not taking care of it correctly.

My friends suggested I stop putting oil sheen in it, so I just brush it out in the morning and occasionally curl or flat iron it. At night I gather it in the back, twist it up and put a scarf on. On a rare night, I take the time to wrap it.

Sometimes I like it because I want my hair to be this long, so it’s fun to play pretend. And I think it looks great , but overall I think I need to take it out.

I Got A Job!!!!

Well, apparently, His eyes landed on me finally!!!!

I got a job. In My Field and loving it!!! 

I am so excited, I haven’t stopped smiling inside for months!

Despite all of my incessant whining (and possibly because of it), God saw fit to open the door of all doors for me. It’s as if He took it upon Himself to remind me that there isn’t anything too hard for Him.

It’s weird because this job isn’t even something I applied for. It just fell onto my lap, and I quickly realized that it is the job I have been seeking all along. That’s just like God to do exceedingly and abundantly above all I could ever ask or think!!!

I am finally on the road to a successful career doing something I l-o-v-e. It will be challenging and I have a lot to learn, but I cannot remember the last time I have been THIS excited.

I am going to work SO HARD, my co-workers and my boss aren’t even ready. My boss really took a chance on hiring me and she won’t be disappointed. I’m going to outwork everyone because that is the Miss Jabz way.

Of course sunny days like this aren't without a cloud or two in the sky…. I really wish my parents were still alive. They loved to celebrate things with me. My mom would be telling everyone at work about my new job. She’d would have be called me every minute to see how the new job is going. (*SIGH*) I do believe dead people “look down on us”, my parents are definitely proud of me right now.

I am so overwhelmed with blessings, I can’t help but sing myself to sleep and wake up dancing.

After months (that felt like years) of ridiculousness and disappointment on the job front, I finally have the job of my dreams.

(In my Kanye West voice): This is the life that everybody asks for!!!!

Go meeeeeee!

BAD RELATIONSHIPS ARE GIFTS

  

"All, everything that I understand, I understand only because I love."    Leo Tolstoy

What lessons have you learned from the love in your life?

While lying in bed sleepless a few days ago, I started thinking about a conversation I had with friends ... Both told me to “Never give up on love”. What they are not getting is, I have not given up on love, am just cleaning my flat (read on you will get it.... #wink)..... , and making space for the new tenant. I don’t know how long it will take, all I know I don’t want the new tenant to find it messy…..

 

 No matter how badly or sadly a relationship ended, there is always something to learn from that experience. Whatever you learned is your gift. Very often a current or past "failure" is what fuels us to the very success that we’ve always dreamed of. Past relationships give us a clearer picture of what we want and what we don't want in a relationship if we only take the time to examine them.

The key is to, “take the time to examine them”.  Whatever we do, we shouldn't move to another relationship until we have performed this examination. Here is a comparison to make my point. When you renting a flat, you are required to pay a refundable deposit fee and you are refunded this deposit if you leave that flat in a good condition. Consider your heart as the flat and your self-esteem and self-worth as the deposit. If you don’t adequately clean your flat (your heart), you will not get the deposit back (your self-esteem and self-worth intact). Renting offices agents would not dare think of renting an office to a new tenant without first cleaning it up, cleaning out and refurbishing that space. Do the same for your heart; clear away the debris of pain, disappointment, anger, fear, etc. before inviting another guest to occupy your heart.

Now let’s get back to failed relationships as gifts.

One gift a failed relationship can give you is the power of contrast. If you can muster the strength and courage to let go of an unfulfilling relationship, you will soon see just how much precious time and energy you were wasting on something from which you were not reaping any reward.

Another gift a failed relationship can give you is the power of vision. By finally realizing what you don’t want in a partner, you can focus on building your vision of what you do want in a partner. You can now focus on what points of compatibility you desire in a partner.

For the gift of a failed relationship to really be useful, you must decide to bless the relationship and let it go to make room for the type of partner you desire and also to free your previous partner to find a more appropriate mate. In reality, there are no “failed” relationships. Begin to view past relationships as incredible gifts; some relationships offer more incredible gifts than others but gifts nonetheless. As the saying goes, people come into our lives for a reason, a season or a lifetime.

We may never understand or know why we were in a particular relationship. We may never understand or know why people come into our lives and then leave. What I've learned is that if a relationship isn't working, it is not a bad thing or a failure as I believed. It is merely that you, and perhaps the other person have learned what it is that you were supposed to learn by being in a relationship with that other person and it's time to move on to other "lessons."

The purpose of all relationships is to help us to grow--personally and spiritually. Even the most painful and ugly relationships can be gifts in learning more about ourselves, strengthening of our intuition and learning to accept the truth when we see it. The greatest gift of a past relationship is that you now know what you really want in a mate. So instead of looking at a relationship that didn't work out the way you had hoped as a failure, I suggest you look at it for the gift that it is.